Did you just see the Batmobile???
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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