Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize