I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize