I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
wow bdsm is so cute
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
