After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize