I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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