i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
