Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Your face is a jimmy john
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
