Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
there is glitter all over my balls
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
