Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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