hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
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