I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
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