There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
