tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
