She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
