I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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