I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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