i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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