i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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