How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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