Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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