i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
