Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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