Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
you have to choose: penises or morals?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
