um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
