my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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