It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
True strength comes from lack of pants
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize