Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
