That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
