Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
