I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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