You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
it glows. i had to have it.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
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