Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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