Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize