porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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