I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Randomize
