He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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