question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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