Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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