i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
