break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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