Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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