Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
well most of my day revolves around power hour
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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