you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
