i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize