Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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