very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I just gift wrapped bread.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
