I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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