Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize