Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
