kristin has been a bad kristin
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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