Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
